Office coffee

First of all, AACCK.
I am not as much of snob as some (won’t mention names, but she has a coffee maker that costs as much as a developing country), but I WILL NOT drink that slog. The office pool doesn’t even buy the what they think of as “high-end” stuff (in a can). I tried to socialize them by bringing in some good stuff. They just worked their way through it and bought some more nasty stuff. So I don’t contribute to the office coffee fund. I am teased, sometimes even in the meanest of spirits, about being the office coffee snob. (This from bunch of people who attend Nascar races. I’m not too upset.)
So what do I see today? One of the meaner spirited people in the office going to the coffee pot, pouring their slog, turning to the fridge and grabbing MY (labeled) creamer with her influenza B tainted hands. Didn’t even ask. She’s running around the office, coughing, with her steroid inhaler in hand, spreading her germs over my ingestibles. Gotta say, the old punk rock self, buried under lots of education, reared her ugly head. Fortunately, I have learned from my best friend that NOT saying everything that pops into your head is the best office policy one can have. I closed my door and visualized her being hit by a race car. (I’ll be the only one here after a month; it’s really not worth confronting.)
Really, would spiking the creamer with some heavy laxatives be TOO passive aggressive?? Sure would help that punk rock chick I’ve got buried somewhere…